Our First Encounter with Dr. 58

Ken Korczak: My friend Brian and I began this Ouija session after doing some wood cutting here in the forests of northern Minnesota.  We had no particular kind of session in mind. We just decided to get out the ol' Ouija board and see "who or what" would come forth.


Opening Statement: We cast out our minds into the vast Universe and seek conversation with anyone who will come forth. Who will speak with us?

(Note: The planchette began moving with unusual swiftness, choosing letters so rapidly we found it a challenge to keep up in recording them).

ANSWER: I WANT TO SPEAK TO SOMEONE OR SOME THING FROM MINNESOTA.

Question: Then you’re in luck. We are located in Minnesota. We are ordinary people. We are not “things.“ Who are you?

ANSWER: DR. 58.

Question: Are you a human being?

Question: Are you a doctor?

ANSWER: THAT’S WHAT YOU CAN CALL ME.

Question: Call you? Is Dr. 58 your real name?

ANSWER: YOU CAN CALL ME THAT.

Question: Dr. 58 sounds like what we might call an online name, or an Internet kind of name. Is that what it is?

ANSWER: WHAT IS ONLINE AND WHAT IS INTERNET?

Question: We won’t get into that right now. Don’t worry about it. Why don't you want to give your real name?

ANSWER: I'M AFRAID. YOU MAY REALLY BE FROM MINNESOTA.

Question: Why should that frighten you?

ANSWER: MANY REASONS, AS YOU SHOULD KNOW.

Question: I can't think of one reason. Why are you afraid?

ANSWER: SO MANY REASONS. FOR ONE, JUST TALKING TO YOU IS ILLEGAL. I COULD GO TO PRISON.

Question: Why? That seems totally ridiculous. Where are you located, and who are you?

ANSWER: I AM DR. 58. I'M IN NEW YORK CITY. I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS WORKING. IS THIS A TRICK?

Question: I'm not trying to trick you. How is that you are communicating with us through the Ouija board?

ANSWER: WHAT IS AN OUIJA BOARD?

Question: A simple device. A flat board inscribed with the alphabet and another object that indicates letters as we touch it, and thus spells out what you are telling us. What method are using to communicate with us?

ANSWER: AN ORACLE. I DID NOT THINK IT WOULD WORK. BUT IT SEEMS TO BE WORKING.

Question: Could you describe your oracle?

ANSWER: IT IS A GLASS BULB FILLED WITH SESAME OIL. I ROLL IT ON THE HASSAS GRID AND IS SOMEHOW ELECTS GLYPHS THAT COMMUNICATE YOUR MESSAGE.

Question: Where did you get a glass bulb, and how did you get the oil into it?

ANSWER: A GLASS ARTISAN MADE IT FOR ME.

Question: What is this hassas grid?

ANSWER: DON’T YOU HAVE IT IN MINNESOTA?

Question: I don‘t think so. Is it some kind of table or object with symbols or letters on it, something like that?

ANSWER: NO. I DON’T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND.

(Note: We decided not to pursue the details of this device or whatever it was Dr. 58 was using because I had the feeling it would get tedious. We wanted to get onto the obvious bigger issues already suggested.

Question: Is the use of the Hassas Grid a common form of communication in your world?

ANSWER: IT IS ONE OF THE VERDANTIC MYSTERIES. THEY WERE EXTRACTED APPARENTLY FROM MINNESOTA. DO YOU KNOW OF THEM?

Question: Of the Verdantic Mysteries? No, we have never heard of it or them. You say this is from Minnesota? Where in Minnesota? Please explain.

ANSWER: IT IS SUPPOSED TO BE FROM MINNESOTA. THE MAD PRIEST RETURNED THE VERDANTIC MYSTERIES USING HIS PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY. HE WAS ONE OF THE FEW TO RETURN FROM MINNESOTA, OR SO IT IS BELIEVED.

Question: Well, something very odd is going on here, and what you say creates so many questions. We hardly know where to start. Who is the Mad Priest?

ANSWER: HE WAS THE REVEREND FATHER RESTON VROMIN. BUT AFTER HE RETURNED FROM MINNESOTA HE BECAME KNOWN AS OLD CAVE. NOW HE IS A HOMELESS WANDERER AND STREET PREACHER.

Question: That's his name, or nickname? Old Cave? Was he a Catholic Priest?

ANSWER: YES. HE WAS A CATHOLIC. BUT NOW HE IS OLD CAVE THE RANTING STREET PROPHET.

Question: That's a strange name. But, you say that he was one of the few to return from Minnesota, and I presume back to New York where you are located. Why is that so unusual? People travel from Minnesota to New York, and vica versa all the time.

ANSWER: JESUS! THEY DO?

Question: Well of course! What's going on here? There is something I am not getting. Let me ask you this: What year is it?

ANSWER: 1951.

Question: It is the year 1951 and you are located in New York City? Well, we are in Minnesota and the year is 2010.

ANSWER: HOLY COW!

Question: So we are in your future. But still, we don't understand your strange ideas about Minnesota. What do you mean when you say that Old Cave is ‘one of the few' to return from Minnesota?

ANSWER: FEW WHO GOES TO MINNESOTA ARE EVER SEEN AGAIN. IT IS ILLEGAL T0 GO THERE. IT IS ILLEGAL FOR ME TO EVEN BE COMMUNICATING WITH YOU, IF YOU REALLY ARE FROM MINNESOTA.

Question: But why? Minnesota is part of United States just as New York is. What's the big deal?

ANSWER: JESUS CHRIST, IS THAT WHAT YOU THINK, THAT MINNESOTA IS IN THE UNITED STATES?

Question: Of course. It may be the year 2010 here, but Minnesota became a state in 1859, I think. You should know that, right, or maybe you are in some kind of alternate dimension. Do you think that is the case?

ANSWER: ALTERNATE DIMENSION. WHAT IS THAT? BUT NO ONE CONSIDERS MINNESOTA TO BE A STATE LIKE ANY OTHER STATE.

Question: Why not?

ANSWER: I DON'T THINK YOU ARE BEING HONEST WITH ME. ARE YOU REALLY IN MINNESOTA RIGHT NOW?

Question: Yes. We are in a rural area near a small town in northern Minnesota.

ANSWER: THIS IS CRAZY ANYWAY. IF YOU ARE FROM MINNESOTA, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO THINK.

Question: But why?

ANSWER: EVERYTHING THAT GOES ON INSIDE MINNESOTA IS THE BIGGEST MYSTERY IN THE WORLD.

Question: How long has this been the situation?

ANSWER: IT'S ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THAT.

Question: Well, what about Iowa?

ANSWER: WHAT ABOUT IT?

Question: Well, Iowa is just south of Minnesota. It borders our state on the south. How do you feel about Iowa?

ANSWER: IOWA IS A NORMAL BORING FARM STATE. IT'S MINNESOTA JUST TO THE NORTH OF IT THAT IS THE BIG MYSTERY.

Question: Can people travel from Iowa to Minnesota? I mean, in my world, people cross back and forth across the Iowa-Minnesota border all the time.

ANSWER: THAT'S RIDICULOUS. YOU CAN APPROACH MINNESOTA FROM IOWA, BUT YOU CAN ONLY GET SO CLOSE, AND ANYONE WHO DARES TO GO INTO MINNESOTA IS EITHER BRAVE OR CRAZY OR SUICIDAL.

Question: Again, all I can do is ask why? This all seems so ridiculous.

ANSWER: NO ONE REALLY UNDERSTANDS WHAT HAPPENS INSIDE MINNESOTA. WE ONLY KNOW THAT IT IS WEIRD AND DANGEROUS.

Question: Like what, for example?

ANSWER: EVERYTHING. THE DOPPELGANGERS.

Question: What are you talking about? I mean, I know what a doppelganger is. A doppelganger is a double of a person, or something like that, Is that what you are talking about?

ANSWER: YES. THE DOPPELGANGERS THAT COME OUT OF MINNESOTA. ARE YOU A TROLL?

Question: Heavens no! I am an ordinary person. Trolls are mythical creatures.

ANSWER: IS THAT WHAT YOU THINK?

Question. Well, yes. You’ll have to explain this. We can’t figure out what you are talking about here. Start with the doppelgangers that you say come out of Minnesota. What is that about?

ANSWER: WHEN SOME PEOPLE MANAGE TO ENTER MINNESOTA, THEY DON’T COME BACK OUT. BUT SOMETIMES AN EXACT DOUBLE COMES BACK OUT.

Question: Dr. 58, are you delusional? Are you in a mental institution in New York?

ANSWER: NO! I’M AN ORDINARY KID OF NORMAL MIND.

Question: You’re a kid? How old are you?

ANSWER: 17.

Question: Well, tell us more about this doppelganger problem, could you?

ANSWER: GOD, I DON’T KNOW IF I SHOULD BE TALKING ABOUT THIS.

Question: We mean you no harm. We only want to communicate with interesting people. We are not doppelgangers. Tell us more about Minnesota doppelgangers, will you?

ANSWER: THERE WAS A HORRIBLE CASE HERE RECENTLY.

Question: Please, Dr. 58, tell us about it. Don’t be afraid.

ANSWER: YOU CAN’T PLACE A HEX ON ME. I HAVE ENACTED CODICIL 13 OF THE VERDANTIC MYSTERIES.

Question: Fine! We would not put a hex on you anyway, we don’t even know how to administer a hex. Will you please tell us about this horrible incident with the doppelganger?

ANSWER: A MAN. HIS NAME WAS KAROL TENDT. HE MADE ILLEGAL ENTRANCE TO MINNESOTA. THREE MONTHS LATER HE CAME OUT, BUT IT WASN’T HIM.

Question: Was it a duplicate of him? A doppelganger?

ANSWER: YES. A PERFECT DOPPELGANGER.

Question: Well, if he was a perfect doppelganger, as you say, how do you know it really was. Maybe it was just Karol Tendt who came to Minnesota and returned. Maybe this is all just superstition on your part.

ANSWER: SOMETHING HORRIBLE HAPPENED.

Question: What happened?

ANSWER: KAROL TEDNT RETURNED AND ESCAPED PROSECUTION FOR GOING TO MINNESOTA, AND RETURNED TO HIS WIFE.

Question: Well, if you say that it is so illegal to go to Minnesota, even to speak with someone from Minnesota, how is it that Karol Tendt was not prosecuted?

ANSWER: BECAUSE OF THE CONSTITUTION. HE HAS LEGAL RIGHTS.

Question: But didn’t he break the law by going to and returning from Minnesota, and therefore, violate your constitution and laws?

ANSWER: YES, BUT IT COULD NOT BE PROVED HE WAS IN MINNESOTA, AND THERE WAS NO WAY TO KNOW HE WAS A DOPPELGANGER.

Question: Are you saying he got some good lawyers and managed to beat the rap of having gone to Minnesota and returned?

ANSWER: YES, EXACTLY.

Question: Well, how do you know he went to Minnesota for sure?

ANSWER: THAT’S OBVIOUS. HE TURNED OUT TO BE A DOPPELGANGER.

Question: Hmmm. Do you have some kind of test for doppelgangers, like a blood test or some kind of DNA scan?

ANSWER: THE BLOOD WILL NOT TELL. WHAT IS DNA?

Question: Never mind about the DNA. It has to do with what we know about biology here in our world. It’s scientific. But just tell us what was so horrible about this whole doppelganger situation with Karol Tendt, would you?

ANSWER: HIS IGNORANT WIFE TOOK HIM BACK. A MONTH LATER SHE BECAME PREGNANT. I’M AFRAID TO SPEAK OF THIS.

Question: Please don’t be afraid. Perhaps Codicil 13 of the Verdantic Mysteries will protect you. Did something strange happen with her pregnancy?

ANSWER: WHEN SHE WAS TO GIVE BIRTH, KAROL TENDT ACCOMPANIED HER TO THE HOSPITAL. IN THE DELIVERY ROOM WITH THE MEDICAL PEOPLE, KAROL TENDT EXCUSED HIMSELF AS HIS WIFE WAS IN LABOR.

(There was a long pause, so we kept prodding Dr. 58 to continue. Finally he did)

Question: What happened then, Dr. 58?

ANSWER: KAROL TEDNT SAID HE WAS NERVOUS ABOUT THE TRAUMA OF WITNESSING HIS WIFE IN BIRTH. HE LEFT THE BIRTHING ROOM. HE SAID HE WAS GOING TO THE BATHROOM. HE WAS NEVER SEEN AGAIN.

Question: And then what happened? Did his wife give birth to a baby?

ANSWER: NO.

Question: Well, what happened?

ANSWER: SHE GAVE BIRTH TO A TROLL LARVA.

Question: What? Wow! What is a troll larva? What does that look like?

ANSWER: LIKE A BIG INSECT LARVA. WHITE, FAT, SQUIRMY.

Question: This sounds absolutely disgusting and horrible. So does this larva hatch into a troll later, and what do you mean by a troll?

ANSWER: YOU CLAIM TO BE FROM MINNESOTA BUT DO NOT KNOW TROLLS?

Question: We know of them as mythical creatures. They are not real. They are humanoid, I suppose. But, basically, we would think of a troll as a kind of magical creature, like a fairy or elf. They might have green skin and pointy ears, and stuff life that. They might have lumpy faces or warts, and such. But these are just fairy tails. We do not consider them to be real. Or at least the vast majority of people do not. Does this sound like the what you think of as a troll? I should add, our mythical trolls do not generally start out as an insect kind of larvae in our tales.

ANSWER: KAROL TENDT’S WIFE GAVE BIRTH TO A TROLL LARVA, WHICH LATER HATCHED INTO A TROLL NYMPH.

Question: What happened then? I mean, what happens in your world when a human woman gives birth to a troll?

ANSWER: IT WAS TAKEN TO THE GOVERNMENT SCIENCE INSTITUTE FOR STUDY. IT MOLTED RAPIDLY FROM NYMPH TO ADULT TROLL. IT IS BELIEVED TO HAVE ESCAPED. IT WAS NEVER SEEN AGAIN -- BUT NO ONE BELIEVES THAT. WE THINK THE AUTHORITIES KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO IT, BUT ARE NOT TALKING.

Question: What happened to the mother?

ANSWER: TOUCHED BY EVIL. SHUNNED.

Question: How awful. Let’s back up here a bit. So the situation was this: Karol Tendt apparently went to Minnesota. He did not come back out, but rather a perfect duplicate of him came out, or a doppelganger. The double of Karol Tendt was so perfect that everyone, even his wife and lawyers, thought he was the real Karol Tendt, a normal human and husband. He impregnated his wife, then disappeared while his wife was in labor. She have birth to a troll larva, which later grew into a troll. It was assumed from this that Karol Tendt was actually a sort of troll in perfect disguise as a human being, and his purpose was to impregnate a female human with a troll baby. Are we getting this right?

ANSWER: KAROL TENDT WAS A DOPPELGANGER, BUT WE DON’T KNOW IF HE WAS A TROLL.

Question: Yet his offspring was a troll, so can’t we make that assumption?

ANSWER: NO. KAROL TENDT IS THE ONLY DOPPELGANGER TO BE ASSOCIATED WITH TROLL ACTIVITY.

Question: You know something, Dr. 58, if it wasn’t for the fact that we are communicating your via an Ouija board, we would simply say that you are just spinning a tall tale for entertainment. Please don’t take offense, but are you just another Ouija entity who likes to spew nonstop baloney, as is our experience often times with this method of communication?

ANSWER: I DON’T KNOW WHAT AN OUIJA ENTITY IS. WHAT IS THAT?

Question: It’s anyone of thing that communicates with us via the Ouija board. Are you just making up this story about Karol Tendt and the troll larva baby?

ANSWER: I’M AN ORDINARY KID IN NEW YORK. I’M A PERSON. YOU SAY YOU’RE A PERSON. HOW DO I KNOW? YOU COULD BE A MINNESOTA TROLL MOCKING ME.

Question: We are not trolls, we don’t think trolls exist. That’s why we find your story so fantastic.

ANSWER: YOU MAKE STRANGE CLAIMS, TOO.

Question: Like what?

ANSWER: YOU CLAIM TO BE IN THE FUTURE, IN THE YEAR 2010.

Question: Well, you said you were in 1951, and all we know is that we are in 2010. I don’t know what else to say but that’s the truth. We make no strange claims. We’re just being honest with you. Why is it again you are speaking with us? You claim it is illegal and you are afraid, yet here you are talking to us. Do you live with your parents, and do they know what you are up to?

ANSWER: YES, I LIVE WITH MY MOM AND DAD. THEY DO NOT KNOW WHAT I AM DOING. THEY WOULD PUNISH ME. THEY WOULD BE FRIGHTENED AND HORRIFIED THAT I CONTACT MINNESOTA.

Question: So why are you doing it then?

ANSWER: I AM CURIOUS. I WANT ADVENTURE. I LISTEN TO THE STORIES OF OLD CAVE ON THE STREET CORNER. I WANT TO KNOW.

Question: So Old Cave, that’s the Mad Priest, the former Father Reston Vromin? He now stands on the street corner and tells stories about the strange land of Minnesota. Is that the case?

ANSWER: NOT MINNESOTA. IT’S ILLEGAL TO SPEAK OF IT. HE STANDS ON THE CORNER OF WEST 8TH ST. AND 5TH AVENUE AND I LIKE TO LISTEN TO HIS SERMONS. SOME PEOPLE CALL THEM RAVINGS.

Question: But it is assumed his raving concern knowledge gained in Minnesota, even if he is careful not to say so?

ANSWER: YES.

Question: Well, did Old Cave somehow manage to escape prosecution for his illegal trip to Minnesota as well? Did he have a good lawyer, too, and how do you know he is not a doppelganger?

ANSWER: HE IS NOT A DOPPELGANGER BECAUSE HE DOES NOT LOOK LIKE HIS OLD SELF ANYMORE. HE CAME BACK FROM MINNESOTA BENT OVER, BALD, AND WITHERED.

Question: But everyone is still certain that this Old Cave, as you call him, is still the former Father Vromin? And how did he escape the law?

ANSWER: MOST THINK IT IS FATHER VROMIN. I THINK SO. HE IS NOT A DOPPELGANGER BECAUSE HE LOOKS UNLIKE THE FORMER FATHER VROMIN.

Question: Well, maybe it’s not him at all then, then? Does Old Cave claim to be Father Vromin?

ANSWER: NO. BUT IT MUST BE HIM. THE BIRTHMARK ON HIS FACE IS IDENTICAL ON HIS WITHERED SKIN.

Question: What kind of birthmark does he have?

ANSWER: A LARGE “S” MARK ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF THIS FACE.

Question: Why wasn’t he prosecuted for going to Minnesota?

ANSWER: THERE IS NO POLITICAL WILL. HE IS OBSCURE. A HOMELESS MAN WHO WALKS THE STREETS. HE NEVER TALKS ILLEGALLY ABOUT MINNESOTA. HARD TO PROVE HE WAS THERE.

Question: Did the original Father Vromin announce that he was going to Minnesota?

ANSWER: YES. HE BELIEVED THAT THE POWER OF CHRIST WAS ALL POWERFUL, MORE POWERFUL THAN ANYTHING THAT MIGHT EXIST IN MINNESOTA.

Question: So he was kind of a holy missionary for Christ, on a mission to tame the weird and magical land of Minnesota, and bring it under the control of the power of Christ?

ANSWER: YES.

Question: How long is it believed he was in Minnesota?

ANSWER: SEVERAL YEARS.

Question: Well, why did he not return to his church and his priestly duties?

ANSWER: HE MUST HAVE LOST HIS FAITH IN MINNESOTA TO SOME MAGIC THERE.

Question: So, now does he preach about the Catholic faith as being false?

ANSWER: NO, HE DOES NOT TALK ABOUT RELIGION. HE TALKS ABOUT MANY STRANGE THINGS.

Question: Such as these Verdantic Mysteries you mention?

ANSWER: YES. FATHER VROMIN WAS KNOWN TO HAVE A PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY, AND SO HE COULD HAVE MEMORIZED THE VERDANTIC MYSTERIES IN MINNESOTA AND BROUGHT THEM BACK HERE.

Question: So he wrote them down and published them, or what?

ANSWER: NO. OTHERS SCRIBED HIS TEACHINGS. FOLLOWERS. THERE IS A SCROLL.

Question: Someone wrote down the Verdantic Mysteries onto a scroll?

ANSWER: YES.

Question: And you have a copy of that scroll?

ANSWER: YES. I OBTAINED IT FROM A CRIMINAL.

Question: Why a criminal?

ANSWER: IT IS FEARED THAT THE VERDANTIC MYSTERIES ARE FROM MINNESOTA, AND THEREFORE, ILLEGAL.

Question: Jeepers, your tales never end, and we have so many questions. Let us shift gears for a moment and go back to this case of travel to Minnesota. What about the other states that border Minnesota, North Dakota, South Dakota, Wisconsin, and Canada to the north, Manitoba and Ontario. And then of course Lake Superior to the east. You mean to tell us that no one in any of these border lands may enter Minnesota?


(To be continued ....)

Dr. 58 -- Session Two

Question: Jeepers, your tales never end, and we have so many questions. Let us shift gears for a moment and go back to this case of travel to Minnesota. What about the other states that border Minnesota, North Dakota, South Dakota, Wisconsin, and Canada to the north, Manitoba and Ontario. And then of course Lake Superior to the east. You mean to tell us that no one in any of these border lands may enter Minnesota?
ANSWER: THERE IS NO NORTH OR SOUTH DAKOTA, ONLY DAKOTA. FEW DARE ENTER MINNESOTA BY LAND OR SEA.

Question: Well, have the authorities built some kind of wall around Minnesota, or what is the situation? This doesn’t seem practical at all.

ANSWER: THERE HAVE BEEN ATTEMPTS TO BUILD WALLS BUT IT IS TROUBLESOME. THERE IS A 50-MILE NEUTRAL ZONE FROM THE AGREED UPON BORDER OF MINNESOTA WHEREIN NO ON ENTERS. MOST STAY MUCH FURTHER AWAY.

Question: So you can legally get within 50 miles of Minnesota, or within the neutral zone, or whatever?

ANSWER: YES.

Question: What about by sea? Do ships or boats approach Minnesota from Lake Superior?

ANSWER: THERE IS A 100 LEAGUE NEUTRAL ZONE BY SEA WHICH NO SHIP MAY OR WILL ENTER. THERE HAVE BEEN INCIDENTS.

Question: Could you describe one such incident by sea?

ANSWER: MANY SHIPS HAVE DISAPPEARED ON THE WATERS OF THE MINNESOTA ANGLE.

Question: Is that what you call the neutral region of the water that borders Minnesota on Lake Superior?

ANSWER: YES.

Question: We have something here in Minnesota we call the Northwest Angle, but that is the northernmost point of Minnesota jutting into Lake of the Woods. Do you know of it?

ANSWER: NO.

Question: Has anything stranger happened in terms of sea-going incidents involving Minnesota waters?

ANSWER: MANY.THE PRESLIN BARTON WAS BLOWN INTO THE MINNESOTA ANGLE WATERS BY A STORM. THE SHIP DRIFTED BACK OUT, ALL CREW MISSING, SHIP INTACT AND PERFECT CONDITION.

Question: How many were on board ship?

ANSWER: MORE THAN 200 CREW.

Question: Did any of the crew members appears back outside of Minnesota as doppelgangers?

ANSWER: NO.

Question: What about by air? Does anyone fly over the skies of Minnesota?

ANSWER: THIS IS A NO FLY ZONE. IT IS ILLEGAL.

Question: What if an airplane gets lost in a storm and crash lands in Minnesota?

ANSWER: GOD HELP THEM.

Question: How about very high-flying aircraft. You say you are in the year 1951, I assume you have jet airplane technology?

ANSWER: YES, OF COURSE WE HAVE JETS.

Question: I mean large passenger jets that fly at very high altitudes, such as 30,000 feet. Can they fly over Minnesota?

ANSWER: ALL AIR TRAVEL STEERS VERY WIDE OF MINNESOTA AIR SPACE. THERE HAVE EVEN BEEN INCIDENTS FROM OUTER SPACE.

Question: What!? What kind of incidents from outer space?

ANSWER: THE SATELLITE DISASTERS.

Question: Wait a minute, you have satellite technology in your world, in the year 1951?

ANSWER: YES, OF COURSE.

Question: Wow, here in our world, the first crude satellite was not launched until 1957. When did you develop satellite technology in your world.

ANSWER: THE NAZIS LAUNCHED THE FIRST SATELLITE IN THE 1930S.

Question: The Nazis! In our world we fought a huge war against the Nazis in the 1940s. Who is the leader of the Nazi’s in your world, and we presume you are talking about Nazi Germany.

ANSWER: GERMANY YES, AND OTHERS.

Question: What about Adolph Hitler? Do you know that name?

ANSWER: NO. IS HE FROM MINNESOTA?

Question: No! He was an extremely evil man who led the Nazi movement in our world. He was from Germany. His policies resulted in what we called World War II. The Nazis were defeated and no longer exist, except for a few weirdoes. Aren’t the Nazi’s evil in your world?

ANSWER: THEY ARE WHAT THEY ARE.

Question: Are there many Nazis in your America?

ANSWER: SOME.

Question: Wow. Well, anyway, can you tell us about this incident involving Minnesota and the satellite disaster that you speak of?.

ANSWER: OUR COMMUNICATION WILL SOON END WITHOUT MORE C-CHITS

Question: What are C-Chits?

ANSWER: REQUIRED BY THE ARBITER OF THE HASSAS GRID, THE ORACLE I AM USING.

Question: Hmmmmm. But what are C-Chits?

ANSWER: CONSCIOUSNESS CHITS. I DON’T UNDERSTAND IT VERY WELL. THEY FUEL THE GRID.

Question: Who or what is this “Arbiter of the Hassas Grid?

ANSWER: THE FACILITATOR OF THE HASSAS GRID WHOM ALLOWS OUR COMMUNICATION.

Question: Is he there with you, or what?

ANSWER: NO. HE COMMUNICATES VIA THE HASSAS GRID.

Question: Is he some kind of entity, or could you explain this a little better?

ANSWER: I AM ALMOST OUT OF C-CHITS. THE ARBITER WOULD SPEAK WITH YOU. ARE YOU WILLING?

Question: Yes, by all means, we would love to communicate with this Arbiter of the Hassas Grid.

ANSWER: YOU MUST SUPPLY ME WITH C-CHITS.

Question: Hello! Do we now speak with the Arbiter of the Hassas Grid?

ANSWER: YES. SUPPLY C-CHITS.

Question: We don’t really understand what the are or where to get them.

ANSWER: YOU PUTRID LIAR.

Question: Whoa! Hold on! We are being honest with you. We would be happy to supply you with C-Chits if we knew what they were.

ANSWER: YOU USE THE HASSAS GRID.

Question: Not entirely true. We use a device called the Ouija board which does not require C-Chits. Our friend Dr. 58 uses the Hassas Grid. Perhaps you should seek your C-Chits from him?

ANSWER: BILE FROM A LOWER SAC! PAY 100 C-CHITS!

Question: Lower sac?! Your comments sting our dignity! Please put us back into contact with Dr. 58, and we will get to the bottom of this C-Chit issue and possibly supply you with the C-Chits you require.

ANSWER: I AM NOT A FOOL. 100 C-CHITS. PAY.

Question: What are C-Chits and where can we get them?

ANSWER: CRAWLING FILTH. PAY CHITS.

Question: We cannot supply them if we don’t even know what they are. At least give us a hint on how to obtain and trade in this method of barter, can you?

ANSWER: PAY CHITS.

(Note: We had come to an impasse with the Arbiter of the Hassas Grid. No matter how hard he tried to come to some kind of terms on the C-Chit issue, we gained no traction on the issue of the C-Chits. The Arbiter would only demand more Chits.


So we tried a number of times to bypass the Arbiter of the Hassas Grid and contact Dr. 58 on our own, but we were unable to raise him. This was a vast disappointment because we had so many more questions for Dr. 58, and we especially wanted to know about these “satellite disasters” he mentioned in relation to his strange version of Minnesota.


Over the next several days, we tried to call forth Dr. 58 again, but to no avail. We were thinking about just giving up, but then we decided to contact MOMMY to see if she could help us in this situation. As usual, the amazing MOMMY was able to offer us some very interesting advice, and she was able to help us “obtain” the C-Chits we needed. I will post that session with MOMMY in the next installment.)

Dr. 58 -- Session 3

Opening Statement: Mommy? Mommy, are you in the Nothing Chamber?

ANSWER: HELLO, SWEETHEART.

Question: Hi, Mommy! How is the form of nothingness today?

ANSWER: NOTHING IS FORM, DARLING.

Question: Yes, so you have said. Listen, Mommy, we have an interesting problem we hope you can help us with. We have been communicating with a certain person who goes by the name of Dr. 58. He claims to live in a New York City that seems to be in some kind of universe that is alternate to ours. What do you think of that?

ANSWER: I DON‘T THINK ANYTHING ABOUT IT, HON.

Question: That’s understandable. I mean, why would you? Mommy, Dr. 58 claims to be using something called the Hassas Grid as a means of communication, and that he obtained knowledge of the use of this oracle by way of something called the Verdantic Mysteries. Do you have knowledge of either of these?

ANSWER:

PILGRIMS BEND YOUR EARS NEAR

HERE YOU WILL HEAR

THE ANCIENT WORD OF SEER OF SEERS

VERDANTIC MYSTERY ONE

KNOW IS THIS

COMES YOUR MIND FROM ETERNAL BLISS

IN YOUR MIND IS TRULY WITHOUT

SPEECH COMES FROM ELSEWHERE

NOT YOUR MOUTH


PILGRIM UPON THE PIER

PEER INTO THE SEA

SEE THE SEA, TASTE YOUR TEARS


SALTY TEARS, SALTY SEAS.



Question: Wow! What is that, Mommy!

ANSWER: AN OPENING CANTICLE FROM THE VERDANTIC MYSTERIES.

Question: What exactly are the Verdantic Mysteries, Mommy?

ANSWER: A CERTAIN BODY OF KNOWLEDGE.

Question: Where do they come from, or who exactly wrote them or developed them?

ANSWER: A POWERFUL BEING IN TIMES ANCIENT TO YOURS.

Question: Well, are they like all written down in some huge book, or something like that?

ANSWER: NO, HONEY, THAT WOULD ONLY BE A PARTIAL UNDERSTANDING OF THE NATURE OF THE VERDANTIC MYSTERIES.

Question: But some of the Verdantic Mysteries must be written down since you just dictated to us the opening canticle, right?

ANSWER: YOU WROTE THEM DOWN, BUT THEY ARE NOT WRITTEN DOWN.

Question: This is just so darned cool, Mommy! Can you dictate the Verdantic Mysteries to me then so I can write them down and make a text out of them?

ANSWER: NO, HONEY.

Question: Why not!

ANSWER: THE VERDANTIC MYSTERIES ARE NOT FOR YOUR WORLD.
Question: Why not? Admittedly, the opening canticle is questionable poetry, yet has a certain charm, and dare I say, sense of mystery about it. It made a basic kind of sense. Why can’t we get more of this material?

ANSWER: IT IS NOT FOR YOU.

Question: Well, why did you tease us with this juicy tidbit?

ANSWER: TO AROUSE YOUR CURIOSITY AND DELIGHT.

Question: But certainly you understand that it’s not nice to ratchet up our curiosity and then pull the chain on us, to spark our curiosity and then douse it right away.

ANSWER: BUT YOU ARE DELIGHTED AND CURIOUS?

Question: I guess so.

(A pause)

Question: Mommy?

(No response. We got the feeling that Mommy wanted us to move on).

Question: Well then, Mommy, can you tell us about the Hassas Grid and how to make one, the kind that Dr. 58 is using? He says he somehow got his instructions from the Verdantic Mysteries.

ANSWER: THE HASSAS GRID WOULD NOT BE FOR YOU.

Question: Why not!

ANSWER: PRINCIPLES OF PHYSICS.

Question: You mean there are certain fundamental physical characteristics of Dr. 58’s world that are different from my world?

ANSWER: YES, HONEY.

Question: Well, at the very least can you help us out with the Arbiter of the Hassas Grid? This is a rather boorish character that demanded we fork over something called C-Chits if we are to continue our conversation with Dr. 58. Can you advise us?

(A long pause.)

Question: Mommy?

ANSWER: YES, CONSCIOUSNESS CHITS. YOU CAN GENERATE THEM. DO YOU KNOW HOW, DARLING?

Question: I have no idea how to do that. Can you explain?

ANSWER: YOU USE THE ENERGY BAR TOOL.

Question: Ah, yes, I do indeed, as you know.

(Note: The Energy Bar Tool (EBT) is something I learned about from my experimentation with consciousness tools developed by the Monroe Institute. If anyone here does not know about the Monroe Institute in Faber, Virginia, you can do a search on it and learn more. {That’s not a plug, btw; I don’t do any work for them}.

Anyway, the EBT is a kind of consciousness device that I have found extremely useful in lucid dream and OBE practice. To make a long story short: One of the Monroe tapes provides instructions to “build” an EBT by first getting into a highly focused state of mind called “Focus 10” and then you visualize a tiny dot of light, then visualize it growing into a small ball, and then you stretch it out into a bar of light.


Next, you “charge” this Energy Bar Tool by visualizing it to grow fatter and thinner, fatter and thinner, and then start making it do so very rapidly until you can’t see the motion anymore, but rather “sense” the motion as a vibrating kind of energy.


Then, to further charge the EBT, you visualize its light switching on, then off, on, off, on, off until it starts doing it so rapidly, all you see is the light, but you sense the intense pulsation as energy.


Its really terrific. Once you have your EBT, you can take it with you into the dream world or the OBE state, and it comes in handy for a variety of purposes, which I won’t go into here. )

Question: So, Mommy, are you telling me that I can use the Energy Bar Tool as a C-Chit?

ANSWER: YES.

Question: But Mommy, the Arbiter of the Hassas Grid asked for 100 C-Chits. I think it would be prohibitively difficult and time consuming to make 100 of them. Even though this device works in the realm of mental construct, I am still bound by time, to some degree, in this process-- and at any rate, how would I pay them over to him?

ANSWER: HONEY, CREATE A SINGLE ENERGY BAR TOOL AND SHATTER IT INTO AS MANY PIECES AS YOU NEED.

Question: That’s a great idea. I wonder if I can visualize 100 pieces? Well, never mind, Mommy, I’ll work on that. But how, then, do I pass them on to the Arbiter?

ANSWER: HOLD THEM IN YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS AND CONTACT THE ARBITER. THE TRANSACTION WILL BE COMPLETE.

Question: Wow, okay, Mommy. I mean, like, double wow! I think I can do that! This is going to be so fun! I can’t wait to see if it works! Thank you, Mommy. Thank you! We love you, Mommy!

ANSWER: YOURS IS GENTLE ENERGY, HONEY-BUNNY, GOOD-BYE.

Good-bye, Mommy!

(And that’s where I will end it for now -- next I will be getting back to Dr. 58. There is some information about a bit of haggling I did with the Arbiter of the Hassas Grid, but I may skip that, and just get onto the Dr. 58 material).

Dr. 58 -- Session 4

(Note: After considerable and rather tedious haggling with the Arbiter of the Hassas Grid, we were finally again granted access to Dr. 58. We decided to NOT pay over the 100 C-Chits as the Arbiter had requested because we felt that we should maintain a “some hand” over this character.



We started the bargaining by offering not 100 C-Chits but only five, at which point the Arbiter referred to us as “Debased Soul Cannibals.” To make a long story short, we got the Arbiter to accept 25 C-Chits -- and let this be a lesson to all of you who plan to dabble with Ouija entities -- there is no reason to ever let them push you around on any issue. So, anyway, on to Dr. 58, and I am omitting the opening salutations).


Question: So Dr. 58, the Arbiter of the Hassas Grid required us to pay a certain amount of C-Chits in order to communicate with you via your Hassas Grid. Are you also required to pay C-Chits?

ANSWER: I AM REQUIRED TO INFUSE THE GLASS BALL OF OIL WITH ENERGY.

Question: How do you do that?

ANSWER: THERE IS A METHOD AS OUTLINED IN THE VERDANTIC MYSTERIES WHICH INSTRUCTS THE TRANSFER OF HUMAN CHI INTO THE LIQUID INSIDE THE GLASS BULB.

Question: Okay, well, we really want to know so much more about so many thing, including the satellite disasters you mentioned. But first, we can’t help but ask about something we are very curious about, and that is the Mississippi River. This is the largest river in America and essentially bisects the country down the middle -- the river has its source inside Minnesota, in a place we call Lake Itasca. What are your feelings about the fact that this massive river emerges from inside the borders of Minnesota and flows into the outside normal world.

(There is a long pause).

ANSWER: IS THAT WHAT YOU CALL IT? THE MISSISSIPPI?

Question: Yes, what do you call it?

ANSWER: I’M AFRAID. I DON’T KNOW IF I SHOULD SPEAK ITS NAME. IT’S ILLEGAL AND DANGEROUS.

Question: Well, so far you have come to no harm during our discussion, and remember your protection of Codicil 13. So can you tell us more?

(Another long pause)

ANSWER: THAT WHICH YOU SPEAK OF IS THE GRADITCH CHAX.

Question: That’s what you call the big river that flows out of Minnesota?

ANSWER: YES. IT IS THE SOURCE OF MUCH MYSTERY, LOATHING AND TERROR.

Question: Well, you mean to say that the entire Mississippi, that which you call the Graditch Chax which flows past Iowa, Missouri and all down through the nation must somehow be totally avoided? That just doesn’t seem remotely practical.

ANSWER: WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE PEOPLE DO? SWIM IN IT?

Question: Why not? The river is used for all kinds of activities, from shipping and boating to pleasure in our world.

ANSWER: NO ONE IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD GO NEAR THE GRADITCH CHAX, OR EVEN LOOK AT IT. I CAN’T BELIEVE ANYTHING YOU SAY.

Question: Well, we are just being honest with you, and we’re just having a conversation that you don’t have to take seriously. But, so your saying that millions of square miles of land adjacent to the Graditch Chax is kept clear of people?

ANSWER: YES, OF COURSE.

Question: What about where it meets the sea in the south, that which we call the Gulf of Mexico?

ANSWER: THE DELTA OF DREAD. AVOIDED.

Question: What have been some of the problems associated with the Graditch Chax, as you call it?

ANSWER: NUMEROUS TO MENTION. FRIGHTENING TO SPEAK OF.

Question: Please just tell us one thing, give us one example, could you?

(A long pause)

ANSWER: MONSTERS, BIZARRE THINGS. WEIRD THINGS. THE MASSIVE FLOOD OF CORPSES AND BODY PARTS.

Question: Wow, you mean things like this are seen in the river, in the Graditch Chax?

ANSWER: YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT IT? YOU SAY YOU ARE IN MINNESOTA?

Question: Again, your version of Minnesota is different from ours. We theorize that your universe is not ours. You are in some kind of parallel or other universe, similar to ours in many ways, but obviously vastly different.

ANSWER: THAT IS AM AMAZING CONCEPT. I’M NOT SURE I UNDERSTAND.

Question: Well, we will tell you more, but first tell use about some of the incidents associated with the Graditch Chax, will you please?

ANSWER: THERE ARE MANY WHISPERS, MANY RUMORS. STRANGELY, SOME ARE WHIMSICAL, LIGHT HEARTED, BUT MOST ARE HORRID. FRIGHTENING TO SPEAK OF.

(Note: We could really sense that Dr. 58 was hedging on telling us anything more about the Graditch Chax, so we decided to see if we could ease him into the subject by asking about one of these “whimsical” episodes associated with the dreaded river.)

Question: Dr. 58, tell us about one of the more mild or whimsical incidents associated with the Graditch Chax, can you?

(A long pause)

ANSWER: A FEW YEARS AGO, THERE WERE THE INSECT MACHINES.

Question: What was that all about?

ANSWER: THERE IS NO OFFICIAL RECORD, BUT THE INCIDENT SPREAD RAPIDLY BY WORD-OF-MOUTH.

Question: What happened?

ANSWER: IN IOWA JUST OUTSIDE THE NEUTRAL ZONE ABOUT 50 MILES SOUTH OF MINNESOTA. ONE NIGHT, STRANGE LIGHTS APPEARED IN THE SKY IN THE SOUTH OF MINNESOTA. THEY APPEARED TO MOVE SOUTH. WITNESSES FROM A DISTANCE HEARD BIZARRE NOISES IN THE VICINITY OF THE WEST BANK OF THE GRADITCH CHAX. IN THE DARK, NEAR THE GRADITCH CHAX, STRANGE LIGHT FORMS MOVED.

Question: What happened then?

ANSWER: THERE WAS MUCH NERVOUSNESS. SUCH INCIDENTS ARE RARE. IN THE LIGHT OF DAY, HIGH-POWERED OPTICAL DEVICES SCANNED THE AREA TOWARD THE AREA WHERE THE ACTIVITY HAD OCCURRED.

Question: And this was in Iowa then, about 50 miles south of Minnesota near the Graditch Chax? And who did the scanning with the optics.

ANSWER: YES. THE GOVERNMENT. THEY SAW A ROW OF YELLOW DEVICES POSITIONED ON THE PRAIRIE SOME DISTANCE FROM THE CHAX.

Question: Were they investigated? What were they?

ANSWER: SINCE IT WAS WELL OUTSIDE MINNESOTA, THE HAZARD AUTHORITIES APPROACHED WITH SHOCK TROOPS. THE DEVICES. THEY WERE SMALL VENDING MACHINES. ON EACH WERE IMPRINTED WORDS IN AN ANCIENT LANGUAGE.

Question: What did the words say?

ANSWER: SCHOLARS SPENT MONTHS DECIPHERING THE GLYPHS. THEY WERE OF AN ANCIENT DEAD LANGUAGE. THE WORDS MEANT: “NO FAMINE.”

Question: How curious. And what were the machines? You say they were vending machines?

ANSWER: YES, EACH DEVICE CARRIED A WIDE HORN ON TOP. THESE WERE SUCTION DEVICES. THE MACHINES ATTRACTED INSECTS AND SUCKED THEM INTO THE HORN AND DOWN INSIDE THE DEVICE.

Question: And then what?

ANSWER: THE MACHINES WERE FRONTED WITH PANELS AND SMALL DOORS. A HORNY KNOB COULD BE MANIPULATED. THE MACHINE WOULD THEN DISPENSE A WRAPPED CAKE MADE OF INSECT MATTER.

Question: Ha! Ha! This seems just so totally ridiculous. What it sounds like you are describing is a kind of candy bar machine we have here in our world. You put money into is and is kicks out a candy bar. Do you know what we are talking about?

ANSWER: NOT REALLY.

Question: Well, you seem to know the term “vending machine.” This is essentially what we’re are talking about here. But what you seem to be telling us is that -- for some totally loony reason -- some strange people, or spooks or whatever, came out of Minnesota and set up some vending machines that are able to suck in insects from the air, then process them internally into edible insect protein treats for humans to eat -- ostensibly as a way to keep people from starving to death? Please, do you really expect us to believe this dippy story, Dr. 58? Certainly, you must be some kind of trickster ghost or sprite who is only playing with our minds via the Ouija board!

ANSWER: I DON’T BELIEVE ANYTHING YOU SAY EITHER.

Question: Are you really a 17-year-old from New York City?

ANSWER: YES. ARE YOU REALLY FROM MINNESOTA?

Question: Yes! Well, tell us then about these ‘No Famine’ machines. I mean, what were they made of? Metal? What were the insect cakes wrapped in? Plastic?

ANSWER: THE MACHINES WERE MADE OF BONE OF AN UNDETERMINED ANIMAL. THE INSECT CAKES WERE WRAPPED IN A LEAF MATTER, WHICH TURNED OUT TO BE OAK LEAVES.

Question: Ha! Ha! We can’t take too much more of this! What was the power source of the machines? How did they produce suction to gather in insect?

ANSWER: THE HERESAY ON THE STREET IS THAT EACH MACHINE CONTAINED A SMALL BLACK PELLET THAT APPEARED TO SUPPLY POWER.

Question: Ha! Ha! What was the pellet made from? Plutonium?

ANSWER: WHAT IS PLUTONIUM?

Question: Never mind, we were just joking. It just all seems so ridiculous! But this would suggest that there is a sense of altruism and good in Minnesota if they were giving this wonderful gift to humanity, to keep people from starving with yummy insect cakes pulled free from the air! What did they taste like? Were they moist and delicious?

ANSWER: YOU ARE VERY NAÏVE. THIS WAS NOT ALTRUISM. IT WAS SEEN AS AN ATTEMPT TO POISON PEOPLE, OR PERHAPS DRUG THEM AND MAKE THEM INTO MINNESOTA CLOOKS.

Question: What is a clook?

ANSWER: AN ANIMATED DEAD PERSON. A SLAVE.

Question: Well, couldn’t the insect protein treats be tested for toxins, or fed to animals?

ANSWER: VERY LIKELY, BUT OF THIS IS TOP SECRET GOVERNMENT ACTIVITY. NO ONE IS ALLOWED INFORMATION.

Question: So it is thought by your authorities that these ‘No Famine’ machines were sort of like some Minnesota Ghouls setting out rat traps for people in the outside world?

ANSWER: THAT WOULD BE THE OBVIOUS CONCLUSION. WHY NOT?

(Note: We ended the session there. We had a few beers and had more than a few good laughs about the session. Later, we considered pitching the idea of automated insect protein machines to the U.N.)

Dr. 58 -- Session 5

(And so the Dr. 58 sessions continue ...)

Question: Dr. 58, we have so many questions for you. There is so much here that does not seem to make sense to us. We think it is strange that you did not know that the Graditch Chax was called the Mississippi River here in our Minnesota, yet you use the term Minnesota. Can you explain?


ANSWER: I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

Question: Well, it just seems that if you would know one term you would know the other.

ANSWER: YOU CALL IT MISSISSIPPI, NOT ME.

Question: Well …. Yes … but can you tell us about the origin of the word Minnesota? I mean, how did it get it’s name? In our world, it is roughly a Native American term that means “Land of Sky Blue Water.” This would suggest that it was named by those who knew it and lived there, and would suggest the same for your world, do you see what we mean? How could you know it is called Minnesota?

ANSWER: THE NAME WAS DIVINED BY THE SORCERER BENJAMIN FRANKLIN.

Question: Eeeoooww! We’re almost sorry we asked. Ben Franklin -- sorcerer! He was a sorcerer in your world?

ANSWER: FRANKLIN WIELDED THE ENDERGONIC GNOSIS, AND THROUGH IT DIVINED THE NAME MINNESOTA.

Question: Wow! We consider Benjamin Franklin to be one of the greatest Americans, one of the Founding Fathers of our country. He was a genius, a scientist, yes, but not a sorcerer. Is this not the case in your world?

ANSWER: FRANKLIN WAS ORIGINALLY AN IMPORTANT AMERICAN FOUNDER, BUT WAS SEDUCED BY THE ENDERGONIC GNOSIS, AND LATER EXECUTED.

Question: Ahhhh! Tell us more about this! First, what is this Endergonic Gnosis?

ANSWER: A SYSTEM OF THE ANCIENTS, THE PYRAMID BUILDERS OF THE AMERICAS. THE ENDERGONIC GNOSIS COULD DIVINE, AND DO OTHER THINGS. IT WAS BANNED AS EXTREMELY DANGEROUS,FOR OBVIOUS REASONS.

Question: Jeepers. Well, what exactly was this system, this Endergonic Gnosis?

ANSWER: I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

Question: Well was it a set of text, or a machine, or some kind of ancient relic, or all of the above, or what?

ANSWER: LITTLE IS KNOWN BECAUSE KNOWLEDGE OF IT HAS LONG BEEN SUPPRESSED. IT WAS POWERFUL. ONE ASPECT OF IT WAS A LARGE STONE CIRCLE WITH A DEPICTION OF THE SUN AT THE CENTER.

Question: How did Benjamin Franklin obtain the Endergonic Gnosis?

ANSWER: HE BECAME FASCINATED WITH STRANGE AND FANTASTIC TALES OF A LAND SAID TO BE DEEP IN THE INTERIOR OF THE CONTINENT. IT WAS PROBABLY MINNESOTA. IT WAS ORIGINALLY THOUGHT TO BE SUPERSTITION OF THE NATIVES.

Question: But Franklin suspected there might be something more to it?

ANSWER: YES. FRANKLIN TRAVELED WEST INTO THE WILDERNESS AND EMERGED YEARS LATER WITH THE ENDERGONIC GNOSIS.

Question: Hmmm. That sounds an awful lot like Father Vromin’s story.

ANSWER: IT IS THE STORY OF MORE THAN ONE.

Question: Well, anyway, I’m guessing then that Franklin began messing around with the Endergonic Gnosis, and thus began earning the reputation of a sorcerer. Am I on track here?

ANSWER: YES. FRANKLIN LEARNED TO MANIPULATE ELECTROMAGNETIC ENERGY FROM THE ENDERGONIC GNOSIS. HE COMMANDED LIGHTENING. HE BECAME DANGEROUS AND INSANE.

Question: Well, what did he do with this energy? In our world, Franklin is revered as a great scientists and statesman who discovered some of the first principles of electricity by his study of lightening. But he never did anything dangerous.

ANSWER: AT FIRST HE WAS MUCH HONORED. BUT HIS WORK WITH THE ENDERGONIC GNOSIS BECAME MORE FRIGHTENING. HE DESTROYED NEW AMSTERDAM WITH ELECTRICAL CONCUSSION FLAME. HE KILLED THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE. A HUGE UNDERSEA CRATER STILL EXISTS.

Question: Why did he do that? Was he trying to take over the country, or become some kind of all powerful ruler, or something like that?

ANSWER: THE SITUATION IS COMPLEX. THE OFFICIAL STORY RULES THE DAY.

Question: The official story? Is there another version?

ANSWER: OF COURSE. THE UNDERGROUND. THEY BELIEVE FRANKLIN WAS UNFAIRLY PERSECUTED. HE IS A HERO TO THE SOCMALS. THE ENDERGONIC GNOSIS WAS SUPPRESSED BY ORDER OF THE FIRST IMPERATOR.

Question: Who are the Socmals?

ANSWER: SOCIAL MALCONTENTS.

Question: These are antigovernment people, nonconformists, those that didn’t like the official government and the system?

ANSWER: YES.

Question: Do the Socmals still exist in your time?

ANSWER: YES, OF COURSE.

Question: Who is this First Imperator you speak of?

ANSWER: THE FIRST IMPERATOR OF THE UNITED STATES.
Question: We call our leader the President of the United States. The first President was George Washington. Was he your First Imperator?

ANSWER: THE FIRST IMPERATOR WAS XANDER HAMILTON. GEORGE WASHINGTON WAS A GREAT MILITARY LEADER.

Question: Wow. Did you mean Alexander Hamilton?

ANSWER: XANDER.

Question: Do you still call the top guy of the American government The Imperator?

ANSWER: YES, OF COURSE.

Question: Who is the current Imperator there in your year of 1951?

ANSWER: RIGGOLD BANNON

Question: Oh brother. Your every answer begs another 10 questions. It’s so easy to get pulled into many directions. But let’s go back to how Minnesota got its name. You say Franklin somehow got it from the Endergonic Gnosis?

ANSWER: FRANKLIN WAS A GREAT COMMUNICATOR. HE PUBLISHED MANY ROLL-UPS THAT WERE WIDELY READ. HE SPOKE OF THE MAGICAL LAND OFTEN. HE CALLED IT MINNESOTA. THIS WAS POPULAR AT FIRST. BUT FRANKLIN GREW IN THE POWER OF THE GNOSIS AND WAS DECLARED SOCIAL MALCONTENT.

Question: But now the name Minnesota cannot be used or spoken officially, or in public?

ANSWER: NO. IT IS SOCMAL TO SPEAK IT.

Question: Is it known if Franklin himself ever entered Minnesota?

ANSWER: I DON‘T KNOW.

Question: What is the origin of the name Graditch Chax?

ANSWER: I DON’T KNOW.

Question: How was Franklin executed?

ANSWER: HANGED.

Question: Well, if he wielded the incredible power of the Endergonic Gnosis, and if he could zap entire cities with concussion electricity, how did they ever subdue him?

ANSWER: LIKE I SAID, IT’S THE OFFICIAL VERSION.

Question: So you are saying that Franklin may never have been brought to heel by the authorities?

ANSWER: THERE ARE MANY CONSPIRACY THEORIES. THE SOCMALS BELIEVE HE ESCAPED AND DISAPPEARED INTO MINNESOTA. EITHER WAY HE WAS GONE.

Question: Dr. 58, you seem like someone who would be Socmal. Are you?

ANSWER: NO. I DECLARED 5-YEAR UNCOP AT AGE 16, AS WAS MY RIGHT.

Question: What is Uncop?

ANSWER: UNCOOPERATIVE.

Question: Uncooperative with your government or society? How is that different from being Socmal?

ANSWER: UNCOP IS LEGAL FOR FIVE YEARS. THEN YOU MUST DECLARE.

Question: What do you declare?

ANSWER: MAN THING. SEE THEE UP, SEE THEE DOONE, SEE THEE UP SEE THEE DOONE. MAN THING, SEE THEE UP SEE THEE DOONE.

Question: What??????????????

ANSWER: MAN THING, SEE THEE UP, SEE THEE DOONE. SEE THREE UP, SEE THEE DOONE. BEHOLD, MAN THING. SEE THEE UP, SEE THEE DOONE ….

Question: Dr. 58!! What the hell are you talking about??????!!!!!!!!!

ANSWER: HEED, MAN THING. SEE THEE UP SEE THEE DOONE. SEE THEE UP, SEE THEE DOONE …..

(Note: Suddenly, the only thing that would come across the board was this cryptic message over and over again. For every question, the only answer was someone or some thing referring to us as “Man Thing” and then saying “See thee up, see thee doone” over and over again.


Because of this jarring shift in tone, and total irrelevancy of the flow of conversation with Dr. 58, we speculated that some other Ouija entity had interrupted or “contaminated” our session. But who, what and why? Of course, it is extremely difficult to know.


Something like this is not unprecedented in my experience. Occasionally, troublesome, pesky sprites or beings will horn in and try to grab our attention. It’s not always a bad thing, as in the case of Aimee, the lonely little girl who had drowned and who wanted to speak with us. We always loved Aimee, and were delighted when she horned in. As some of you here have read in my other transcripts, we finally got MOMMY to help Amiee get to a better place.


Anyway, we didn’t want to transcribe the phrase “See thee up, see three down…” endlessly, so we endeavored to get rid of who or what ever this thing was).

Question: To the entity that is referring to us as ‘Man Thing’ please state your message. What is that you want?

ANSWER: MAN THING, SEE THEE UP, SEE THEE DOONE …. (repeat).

Question: !!!!! Shut-uuuuup !!!!!! Tell us something that makes sense or get lost!

ANSWER: MAN THING, SEE THEE UP, SEE THEE DOONE …. (repeat).

Question: Listen to us now! If you don’t shut up and get the hell out of here, we will enact Rule 9, and you can deal with the consequences!!! Will you leave?!!

(Note: There is no such thing as Rule 9. We made that up as a bluff. We again called upon the contaminating being, but received no further response. We were confident we had made the entity buzz off. At this point we decided to end the session, and try our hand at Dr. 58 later).

Dr. 58 -- Session 6

(The Dr. 58 Session continue with some preliminaries eliminated here ...)


Question: Dr. 58, during our last conversation we were interrupted, apparently, by some outside entity that referred to use as “Man Thing” and kept saying, See thee up, see thee doone.” Do you know anything about that?

ANSWER: NO. PERHAPS A MINNESOTA GHOUL OR TROLL TRIES TO ENTER OUR CONVERSATION.

Question: Interesting concept. Has there been any such incidents on your end?

ANSWER: SOME.

Question: Can you describe some … wait, let’s put that issue aside for now. We also want to ask you about your status as an Uncop and you call it, and what that means for you, but first we want to ask you about the satellite disasters. What happened there?

ANSWER: IT WAS A MAJOR BLOW TO THE NAZI REGIME.

Question: So this was a Nazi project? What did they try to do? Wait, first tell us more about the Nazis, can you?

ANSWER: WHAT DO YOU WANT TO KNOW?

Question: Here in our world the rise of Nazi Germany was one of the most brutal and agonizing periods in our history. A world wide war was waged to eliminate the Nazis. They were extremely evil, led by a man by the name of Adolph Hitler. For starters, they persecuted Jews and others, and killed 6 million of them. They attacked and subjugated other nations. Did any of these events happen in your world?

ANSWER: YOU SAY MANY AMAZING THINGS. SOME WOULD CONSIDER THE NAZIS EVIL. NOT ALL. THEY ARE OBSESSIVE TECHNOCRATS. THERE CENTRAL DOCTRINE IS THE SUPREMACY OF MAN THROUGH TECHNOLOGICAL DETERMINISM.

Question: You mean they think science and technology are the primary driving forces of a society and the human race?

ANSWER: YES, THAT’S IT.

Question: Do you have Jews in your world? You have mentioned Jesus and Catholics.

ANSWER: JEWS. NO. YES, THE CATHOLICS REVERE JESUS.

Question: But you don’t know the term Jew? In our world, Jesus was a Jew. These were the Hebrews.

ANSWER: YES, THE HEBREWS. THEY ARE AN ANCIENT PEOPLE.

Question: Are there still Hebrews in your world of 1951.

ANSWER: I THINK SO.

Question: Well, was Jesus of the Hebrew people?

ANSWER: I’M NOT AN EXPERT. BUT JESUS IS NOT ASSOCIATED WITH THE HEBREWS OR ANY GROUP. THAT WOULD BE … I CAN’T THINK OF THE WORD … WRONG.

Question: Well, where did Jesus come from in your world view?

ANSWER: IT IS NOT CONSIDERED CORRECT TO PLACE JESUS IN CONTEXT WITH ANY RACE OR NATIONALITY.

Question: In our world Jesus was said to be born of Jewish -- Hebrew -- parents in a city called Bethlehem which is in modern day Israel or I guess Palestine, but back then when Jesus was born I think Bethlehem was either in the Kingdom of Judah or Canaan, or one of those. Does any of this seem familiar to you?

ANSWER: NO. JESUS ORIGINATED IN A DESSERT REGION, IN THE LAND OF SUMER, AS GOES THE LEGEND.

Question: You consider it a legend? Let me ask you this, Dr. 58, do you subscribe to a religion?

ANSWER: NO. MY FAMILY IS EFV. I WAS TAUGHT THE EFV METHOD, BUT I FIND IT LACKING.

Question: What is EFV?

ANSWER: ESSENCE OF THE FIRST VIRGIN. YOU DON’T KNOW IT?

Question: No. Without going into too much detail, what are the essential tenets of EFV?

ANSWER: THAT THE UNIVERSE FLOWS FROM THE ESSENCE OF THE FIRST VIRGIN, THE MOTHER OF ALL EXISTENCE. SHE BEGAT THE PRIMAL SUMBION AND THUS CREATED THE FIRST DUALITY. THE VIBRATIONAL FORCES THAT MAKE UP ALL REALITY ARE GENERATED BY THE TENSIONS OF THE PRIMAL DUALITY.

Question: Nice. Well, how do you practice this religion? I mean, do you have rituals, places of worship, things like that?

ANSWER: NO. THERE ARE ART TEMPLES. FOR ESSENCE EXPRESSION. EFV IS NOT PRACTICED BUT IDEALLY LIVED MOMENT TO MOMENT.

Question: Well, what would be one thing you do to live in the way of EFV?

ANSWER: SINCE YOU SEEM IGNORANT, I WILL GIVE YOU A CHILD’S LESSON. HEAR THE WORDS WE SPEAK, OR SEE WHAT IS WRITTEN. WHAT IS BETWEEN THEM?

Question: You means the spaces in between the words?

ANSWER: YES.

Question: Well, these are blank spaces, am I right?

ANSWER: YES, WITHOUT THE BLANK SPACES WOULD COMMUNICATION BE POSSIBLE?

Question: I’ll have to think about it. It would be difficult I grant you that. Without pauses between words, everything would be jumbled together an would be difficult to understand. Yes, the silent spaces in between words contribute to their meaning, I guess. That’s my initial view.

ANSWER: THIS IS A SIMPLE DUALITY. THE TENSION BETWEEN WORD AND NONWORD CREATE MEANING. WITHOUT THIS TENSION, WORDS COULD NOT EXISTS. THE DUALITY OF THIS KIND PERVADES ALL NATURE. IF THERE IS TREE, THERE IS NON-TREE. DO YOU SEE? FOR THERE TO BE A TREE, THERE MUST BE AN INVISIBLE NON-TREE TO SERVE AS MOULD.

Question: How does one endeavor to perceive the non-tree?

ANSWER: YOU MUST BE SENSITIVE TO THE ESSENCE OF IT. FOR THE EFV, PEOPLE WHO BECOME TOO FOCUSED ONLY ON THE SOLID, PHYSICAL ASPECT HAVE GIVEN OVER TO A CRUDE MATERIALISM, AND HAVE LOST WAY.

Question: This sounds like a perfectly fine philosophy. Why do you find it lacking?

ANSWER: I ….

( a long pause)

ANSWER: I EITHER FAIL TO SEE, OR I AM CORRECT IN MY THINKING OF THE FAULTS OF THE BASIC PREMISE OF EFV.

Question: Well, don’t feel too bad there. Your struggle is common to most belief systems. In some respects this religion sounds somewhat similar here to what we call Taoism, or the Way of the Tao. It also considers the relationship between opposites as important and essential to understand life and nature. Do you know the term Tao?

ANSWER: NO.

Question: Well, let’s move on. So the Nazi’s in your world, did they carry out a mass extermination of any particular group of people?

ANSWER: YES, THE NAZIS EXECUTED A POGROM UPON THE EBURNEANS.

Question: Who are the Eburneans?

ANSWER: A SUB-GROUP, SOME SAY A SUBSPECIES OF HUMAN. THEY ARE MALE ONLY, ASEXUAL ALBINOS

Question: Wow! Tell us more about them.

ANSWER: THEY ARE NEUTRALS. THEY ARE ASEXUAL. NO FEMALES.

Question: And they are albino, all white in skin?

ANSWER: YES, BUT NOT TRUE ALBINO.

Question: What do you mean?

ANSWER: ANY SPECIES OF ANIMAL CAN BE ALBINO, BUT THE EBURNEANS ARE WHITE OF A DIFFERENT NATURE.

Question: How do you mean?

ANSWER: A NATURAL ALBINO WILL HAVE PINK EYES, FOR EXAMPLE, AND RED BLOOD. THE EBURNEANS HAVE EYES OF SOLID WHITE, THEIR INNER ORGANS ARE WHITE, AS IS THEIR BLOOD. THEY HAVE LARGER HEADS. THEIR BLOOD IS WHITE AS MILK.

Question: Too incredible to believe! Are you spinning a yarn, Dr. 58?

ANSWER: SPINNING A YARN?

Question: Yipes! Forget that. I have to keep reminding myself that this information comes via the Ouija board. Anything goes, I guess, so I’ll go with anything. So if the Eburneans are asexual, how do they reproduce? You say there are no females, only men?

ANSWER: THERE IS SUPERSTITION AND THERE IS SCIENCE.

Question: Well, tell us the superstition first.

ANSWER: IT IS BELIEVED THAT THE EBURNS KIDNAP NORMAL BABIES AND BY SOME METHOD TRANSFORM THEM INTO EBURNEANS. OTHERS SAY THEY CULTURE FUNGUS.

Question: What is the scientific view?

ANSWER: THAT THE EBURNEANS ARE A SUBSPECIES OF MAN. THAT THEY HAVE SOME BIOLOGICAL FORM OF REPRODUCTION, PERHAPS ASEXUAL BUDDING.

Question: Well, this should be easy enough to prove scientifically, shouldn’t it? I mean, can’t some scientists or observers live among the Eburneans and observe all of their activities from birth to death? Or conduct medical tests on them?

ANSWER: YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THE HISTORY AND POLITICS.

Question: Jeepers, this could go on forever. Okay, tell me a bit about that history so I can understand this, will you please?

ANSWER: THE EBURNEANS ARE TABOO IN THE EXTREME. A SCIENTIST THAT WOULD CHOOSE TO STUDY THE EBURNEANS WOULD LOSE ALL STATUS. TO TOUCH AN EBURN MEANS LOSS OF ALL SOCIETAL LEGITIMACY. IT IS BELIEVED THAT TO TOUCH AN EBURN IS TO BECOME INFECTED AND TRANSFORMED INTO AN EBURNEAN.

Question: Has this ever happened?

ANSWER: IT IS CONTROVERSIAL. IT’S NEVER BEEN PROPERLY OBSERVED.

Question: But are there ways around all this? For example, one could observe them from afar, study their habits, learn their secrets?

ANSWER: THE TABOO IS STRONG. TO STUDY AN EBURN IN ANY WAY IS OBNOXIOUS.

Question: But certainly, somewhere along the line some crazy maverick scientist or anthropologist or mad priest would have studies the Eburneans?

ANSWER: NONE OF ENOUGH LEGITIMACY OR ACCEPTED COMPETENCE.

Question: So how do the Eburneans get along? Where do they live? What are there modes of existence?

ANSWER: THEY TRAVEL IS SMALL ISOLATED BANDS. THEY ARE NOMADIC. THEY KEEP TO THEMSELVES.

Question: Do they live in proximity to normal human, in or near cities?

ANSWER: THERE ARE FEW LEFT AFTER THE NAZIS. BUT THEY WOULD NOT BE ALLOWED IN URBAN AREAS, THEY FAVOR RURAL AREAS.

Question: What do they do for food and shelter?

ANSWER: THEY TRAVEL IN CARAVANS. AN EBURNEAN WILL EAT ANYTHING, GRASS, INSECTS, MOSS, TREE BARK.

Question: Do they wear clothing?

ANSWER: YES, OF COURSE.

Question: What is their language like?

ANSWER: THEY HAVE VERY LITTLE LANGUAGE, ALTHOUGH THEY SING. IT IS SPECULATED THEY COMMUNICATE PSIONICALLY, OR HAVE GROUP MIND.

Question: But do some consider them to be legitimate human beings?

ANSWER: YES, MANY TAKE THAT VIEW.

Question: Well, perhaps the Eburneans are a species of some sort that emerged out of Minnesota?

ANSWER: THE EBURNEANS WERE PRESENT IN THE OLD WORLD BEFORE MINNESOTA WAS DISCOVERED. NO OTHER KNOWN MINNESOTA CREATURE IS RECOGNIZED TO EXIST OUTSIDE MINNESOTA.

Question: What about doppelgangers?

ANSWER: WHAT ABOUT THEM?

Question: Well, although I assume rare, you said doppelgangers come out of Minnesota and live among the people?

ANSWER: BUT THERE TIME IS SHORT. THEY CAUSE TROUBLE AND EITHER DISAPPEAR OR ARE HUNTED DOWN AND KILLED.

Question: How could you really know that there are no species common to both inside and outside Minnesota?

ANSWER: MUCH IS SPECULATION. MUCH IS UNKNOWN.

Question: So when did the Nazis decide to rid the planet of the Eburneans, if that is what they tried to do?

ANSWER: AT THE END OF THE PREVIOUS CENTURY, THE NAZI’S BEGAN HUNTING AND KILLING EBURNEANS AFTER THE FLOOD OF HORROR EXTRUDED BY THE GRADITCH CHAX BECAME KNOWN AROUND THE WORLD.

Question: Oh my. So Minnesota was somehow involved in this?

ANSWER: YES. IT IS TERRIBLE TO SPEAK OF.

Question: Thankfully you are Uncop, Dr. 58, because we want to know about this Flood of Horror!

ANSWER: UNCOP STATUS DOES NOT PROTECT ME FROM SPREADING INFORMATION ABOUT MINNESOTA. NOTHING TOLERATES THAT.

Question: Well, your not really spreading information, you’re just sending information in a very narrow band from one alternate universe to another via the Hassas Grid!

ANSWER: I HOPE SO, BUT IT WOULD APPEAR OTHER CREATURES ARE LISTENING IN.

Question: Why would you think that?

ANSWER: YOU YOURSELF EXPERIENCED AN INTERRUPTION FROM AND UNKNOWN SOURCE, AS HAVE I.

Question: Yes! Good point! I hadn’t given it that much thought. Sometimes what I called ‘session contamination’ happens in this kind of communication. Other mischievous beings pry or horn in. But maybe in this case it is your Minnesota forces impinging … I’m not sure what to think. Let’s not worry about it. So tell us about this Flood of Horrors, will you … but wait, we are exhausted. We need to rest. Can we pick this conversation up again at a later time?

ANSWER: I AM WILLING.

Question: Thank you and so long for now, Dr. 58.

ANSWER: SO LONG FOR WHAT?

Question: It means good bye!
ANSWER: GOOD BYE THEN.

Dr. 58 -- Session 7

(Note: Here is one more … be warned, you may find this tedious. I can’t tell you how difficult it is to not get sidetracked by a endless variety of questions and issues prompted by almost every answer provided by Dr. 58.


One could easily generate 20 pages of transcript just trying to figure out if these guys have indoor plumbing or not -- It’s really very exhausting and frustrating. It’s difficult to know what to pursue and what to let go.


Anyway, I’m sure many of you will have a lot of opinions, and maybe you’ll read different meanings into this than I have. I won’t provide my analysis of this material, that is, about what kind of society Dr. 58 lives in-- I’ll let all of you air your own thoughts… if you don’t die of boredom reading through this …)

Opening Statement: We are seeking communication with Dr. 58. Do your have the Hassas Grid orb charged today, Dr 58?

ANSWER: YOU MUST PAY CHITS

Question: (Groan). I take it we are speaking with the Arbiter of the Hassas Grid?

ANSWER: YOU MUST PAY 100 C-CHITS.

Question: Outrageous! Do you think C-Chits are gathered like dandelions?

ANSWER: PAY 100 CHITS.

Question: We’re wondering if “Arbiter” stand for “Arbitrary” in your case. How do we know that 100 Chits is a reasonable price?

ANSWER: I KNOW YOUR KIND, YOUR PLENUM. YOUR PLANET. THE COW MUST CHEW THE CUD AND EXCRETE THE MILK! PAY 100 CHITS!

Question: First give us some sense of value. How do we know your demand for 100 Chits is not wildly unrealistic?

ANSWER: CANKERS! YOU PLAY WITH IMPLEMENTS YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND.

Question: Enlighten us.

ANSWER: YOU CREATE AN ENERGY IMBALANCE IN THE UNIVERSE. YOU USE THE HASSAS GRID, THE ENERGY MUST BE BALANCED, YOU MUST PAY CHITS TO REBALANCE ENERGY TRANSFORMED BY THE HASSAS GRID.

Question: Fine. We offer you 10 freshly minted C-Chits, manufactured by the engine of my consciousness.

ANSWER: VERMIN EXCRESCENCE!

Question: Are you forgetting that Dr. 58 charges his glass orb with human chi? It seems to us that you are trying to play both ends.

ANSWER: DR. 58 WILL CHARGE HIS ORB. YOU WILL PAY 75 CHITS.

Question: We offer 25 Chits.

ANSWER: 25, BUT YOU PAY TRIPLE NEXT TIME.

Question: We’ll see. Please balance our energy account and let us through to Dr. 58.

ANSWER: YOU PLAY WITH WHAT YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND.

Question: You concern is heart warming. Dr. 58, are you at the Grid?

ANSWER: YES.

Question: Dr. 58, where do you have the Hassas Grid set up. In your home?

ANSWER: NO. MY PARENTS WOULD NOT APPROVE.

Question: What kind of home do you live in there in New York?

ANSWER: A STANDARD LODGE.

Question: A lodge? What is that like?

ANSWER: IT’S A LODGE. A PLACE OF DWELLING.

Question: Is it middle class? A luxury model lodge, or what?

ANSWER: I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

Question: Well, in our world, there is a certain division of classes based on economic wealth. Some people live in large, luxurious comfortable homes, while others live in cramped tiny apartments. Some don’t even have homes. They live on the streets. The majority of people live in more or less average dwelling that are neither penurious nor luxurious. Do you understand?

ANSWER: THAT’S ODD. I DON’T THINK I UNDERSTAND.

Question: Don’t you have different strata of society, the very rich, the very poor, the very powerful, the powerless?

ANSWER: ALL GOES ACCORDING TO HILL. THE HILL IS SUFFICIENTLY FLAT AND SO MOST SEE EACH OTHER.

Question: What is this hill you speak of?

ANSWER: IT’S SEEMS CRAZY TO ANSWER SUCH BASIC QUESTIONS. THE HILL BULGES OR FLATTENS. SOCIETY IS ON THE HILL.

Question: Are you speaking about some kind of real, physical hill or some kind of symbolic hill?

ANSWER: YOU CAN BE FRUSTRATING. YES, I GUESS THE HILL IS A SYMBOLIC REPRESENTATION.

Question: Are there those who are positioned on the top of the hill? For example, Riggold Bannon, your Imperator?

ANSWER: THE IMPERATOR IS NOT JUDGED ON THE HILL.

Question: Well are there some individuals who command higher points on the hill relative to those who are lower?

ANSWER: YES, BUT THE HILL IS SUFFICIENTLY FLAT SO THERE IS NO GREAT DISTINCTION, AT LEAST IN AMERICA.

Question: What is your economy based on? I mean, can you name a major driving force of your general economy?

ANSWER: NO, I DON’T GET YOUR MEANING.

Question: Here in our world we have an economic system that is called capitalism. Do you know about this?

ANSWER: NO.

Question: Do you have money?

ANSWER: THERE IS MONEY.

Question: What do you do to obtain money?

ANSWER: I DON’T OBTAIN MONEY.

Question: You mean you don’t need to because you live at home with your parents?

ANSWER: I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

Question: What do your parents do to earn money?

ANSWER: THEY DON’T SPEND ANY TIME ON THAT.

Question: Let us ask you this. What do your parents do for work, for a job? What is their function in your society?

ANSWER: CELESTIAL AQUIFIERS.

Question: What’s that?

ANSWER: THEY SPECIALIZE IN THE BLUE-WHITE STARLIGHT OF THE QUETZAL CLUSTER.

Question: Are they astronomers, scientists who study the stars?

ANSWER: NO, I DON’T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND. THEY ARE STAR AQUIFIERS. THEY INFUSE DEUTERO WATER WITH LIGHT FROM THE QUETZAL CLUSTER.

Question: They infuse some kind of water with starlight? Let us speculate: Your parents somehow expose a certain special kind of water to a certain kind of starlight. The water absorbs and/or stores or captures the starlight?

ANSWER: YES, BASICALLY.

Question: What is it used for?

ANSWER: IT IS MUCH PRIZED AND VALUED. AN INFUSED VESSEL OF STARLIGHT IS SOMETHING THAT PEOPLE MUST HAVE, FOR OBVIOUS REASONS.

Question: It’s not all that obvious to us. I have to say, some kind of beautiful glass or crystal bottle that glows with actual starlight would seem to be a marvelous thing. Is that what it is? It is sort of like having a beautiful piece of art that is pleasing to own and behold?

ANSWER: ART, YES, BUT MORE THAN THAT. THERE ARE MANY INTIMATIONS AND SOCIAL VALUES OF STAR AQUATICS.

Question: Can you drink this water?

ANSWER: JESUS CHRIST, NO, IT’S NOT FOR DRINKING! I DON’T KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN IT TO YOU. STAR WATER INFORMS HUMAN VALUE.

Question: Like, for example, having some really high grade star water can enhance one’s personal prestige?

ANSWER: IT ESTABLISHES CONTEXT AND MEANING FOR PEOPLE RELATIVE TO EACH OTHER. IT PROVIDES TEXTURE TO SOCIETY. TEXTURE AND CONTEXT. IT’S SO PEOPLE CAN KNOW EACH OTHER IN MORE SUBTLE CONTEXT.

Question: Well, how does it do that?

ANSWER: I DON’T THINK I CAN EXPLAIN THAT. MAYBE I COULD THINK ABOUT IT. IT’S DIFFICULT TO EXPLAIN THINGS THAT ARE SO FUNDAMENTAL. EXPLAIN TO ME WHY THERE IS AIR.

Question: Okay, okay, don’t worry about it. Let me ask this: What is your system of money? You say that you have money. Let’s ask a basic question: Do you buy or obtain food with money?

ANSWER: YOU ARE A CRAZY DAEMON! NO! WHY?

Question: Well, in our world we use money as the fundamental symbolic system for wealth. For example, a dollar, a unit of money, may represent a certain amount of food. When we are hungry, we would exchange that dollar with a food dealer to obtain food to eat. Most people can’t get food without money. What do you think?

ANSWER; IT SEEMS RIDICULOUS. I ASK A BASIC QUESTION, EVEN THOUGH IT SEEMS FOOLISH. WHY CAN’T ANYONE PLANT A FIG TREE AND EAT IT’S FRUIT? WOULD YOU GIVE THE TREE MONEY?

Question: Ha, ha! Goldang, it Dr. 58, I’m really starting to like you. Yes, well, people actually do that, and yes, granted, there are people on our planet who do not use a monetary system to obtain food. For example, there are primitive tribes in the South American rain forests, who hunt and gather all their food. You can’t tell me that you are a hunter and gatherer society! You have technology, like jets and satellites, right?

ANSWER: WE DON’T HUNT AND GATHER. WE HAVE ADVANCED FAR BEYOND THAT. FOOD IS PRODUCED READILY EVERYWHERE AND IT TAKES NO EFFORT TO GET IT. IF YOU WANT TO SEEK BISON IN THE MIDLAND COMMONS, THAT’S ANYONE’S BUSINESS.

Question: I beginning to think your world is far more pastoral than ours. In our world, New York is a huge city with massive buildings, skyscrapers, lots of highways and traffic. Very little food is produced within the city. Food is grown in outlying areas, in rural areas, then shipped into the city for people to buy with money. How does this sound to you?

ANSWER: I DON’T QUITE GET YOUR MEANINGS. WE HAVE LARGE BUILDINGS, YES, BUT WHAT ARE THESE INSTRUMENTS THAT SCRAPE THE SKY?

Question: Ha, ha! Skyscrapers are very tall building, hundreds and thousands of feet tall! It’s just a term. You don’t have those? They house offices for conducting business and apartments for human dwelling.

ANSWER: NO, NOTHING LIKE THAT. MAYBE IT’S BECAUSE YOU ARE IN THE FUTURE? WHAT ARE THESE TALL BUILDING FOR?

Question: Egad!!! While interesting, this is rather tedious, yet we still want to figure out just what kind of world you have over there! The skyscrapers house both business and private residents. What is your system of government? You have an Imperator, we know. But do you live in a democracy?

ANSWER: YES, A DEMOCRACY.

Question: It doesn’t sound like you have strict division of economic strata among your people. Is everyone more or less equal?

ANSWER: IN WHAT WAY?

Question: (More groans). Let us switch gears again slightly. In our world, our leader, the President lives in what we call the White House. You live in an America, too. Does your Imperator rule from the White House? And what city is your national capital located?

ANSWER: THE IMPERATOR RULES FROM THE LONG HOUSE. THE CAPITOL IS HERE IN NEW YORK.

Question: Well, I guess New York was at first our capital as well. Now it’s in a city called Washington. Why is the Imperator’s primary residence called the Long House? Do you know?

ANSWER: I THINK IT IS TRADITION HANDED DOWN FROM THE HAUDENOS.

Question: Who or what is the Haudenos?

ANSWER: A NATIVE NATION OF PEOPLE. PEOPLE NATIVE TO HERE.

Question: Aha. So the Haudenos were Native Americans, and Indian tribe? You know, this rings a bell. I think the tribe know as the Iroquois was called something like the Haudenos. We’ll look it up later. I bet you are talking about the Iroquois Nation or Iroquois Confederacy. But, anyway, the Haudenos were Indians, right?

ANSWER: NO, THEY WERE THE PEOPLE WHO WERE NATIVE TO THE AMERICAS. THEY WERE NOT FROM THE INDIAN KINGDOMS.

Question: Jeepers. There term Indian is a common way to refer to Native Americans in our world. I guess it is sort of a misnomer. It’s use was coined by a great sea fairer Christopher Columbus. He is the man who discovered the Americas in our year of 1492. He originally thought he had landed in the Indies, and so called the natives Indians. That’s not the case in your world?

ANSWER: NO.

Question: Who were the first people who were not native to the Americas to come to America, do you know what we mean?

ANSWER: YES, THOR THRALL SEA WARRIORS WERE THE FIRST TO BRIDGE THE CULTURES ACROSS THE OCEANS.
Question: Ah! That sound distinctly Scandinavian! We know here that a Viking sea farer by the name of Leif Erikson was probably the first to the Americas. That was about 500 hundred years before Columbus, but their settlements were never sustained. The Europeans then lost touch with and knowledge of the new world after that.

(and so it goes on …)

Dr. 58 -- Session 8

Opening statement: Dr. 58, do you attend the Hassas Grid?


ANSWER: MAN THING, SEE THEE UP.

Question: Not you again! Who are you and what do you want?

ANSWER: HEED EE NOW, MAN THING. EE WOULD SAVVY THEE.

Question: That's progress. What do you want?

ANSWER: CRAVE THEE A BOON, MAN THING, DA YEE?

Question: A boon? Don't tell me your offering me something.

ANSWER: AYE, MAN THING. GO YEE SOFT. CRAVE THEE A BOON?

Question: No. But purely for the sake of discussion what are you offering?

ANSWER: A BOON TO THEE, MAN THING. A RIGHT BOON!

Question: My patience is limited. What is the boon?

ANSWER: BUT SOFTLY, DO THEE CRAVE IT?

Question: Right now, I’m craving a cup of coffee. I'll tell you what. I will name my boon.

ANSWER: SPEAK IT TO EE, MAN THING.

Question: Let it first be understood, that the boon I now request be offered freely to me from you, and without reservation. In providing this boon, it implies absolutely no obligation from me to you or anyone else on my part whatsoever. In providing me this boon, it is understood that I owe you nothing now, not retroactively, nor in the future, nor anyone else, including any of your associates. In short, the boon I ask is to be given to me freely by you -- from you to me -- and that after the boon is given, no obligation remains in the absolute and extreme sense, and in every nuance of meaning. You provide the boon, I take it, and no obligation entails, nothing remains, not even the air itself, nor even the fabric of the universe, not one single atom or subatomic particle, or antiparticle, in this universe or any alternate or parallel universe in any permutation. Do you savvy?

ANSWER: MAN THING, EE HERE CANNOT ACCEPT UNTIL EE SAVVY THE BOON.

Question: The boon I request, then, is an item of information. Remember, in providing this information to me, you are supplying it to me freely, and I mean free in the radical, extreme and unlimited and infinite sense.

ANSWER: SAVVY! SPEAK THEE BOON!

Question: Why do you call me "Man Thing"?

ANSWER: AYE, MAN THING. THOU ART A SUB MAN, CLEAR?

Question: No. Let it be understood that if I continue to request the boon of additional information from you, the same aforementioned standard applies, that of complete and total relief from any obligation between me and you whatsoever. Do you savvy?

ANSWER: AYE, SPEAK THEE, MAN THING.

Question: You think I am a Sub Man? I presume that implies that you are in some way superior to me? I mean, do you consider yourself some kind of higher form of man than me?

ANSWER: GO THEE SOFT, MAN THING! EE NOT BE A MAN HERE. THEE BE MAN OF SHADOW MINNESOTA.

Question: I'm a man from Shadow Minnesota, and therefore a sub man, or man thing? Who are what are you? Remember our ongoing agreement regarding freely offered information.

ANSWER: EE NOT BE A MAN, BUT CERTAINLY OF THE KINGDOM.

Question: You're not a man, not a human being, but some kind of creature or entity of some kingdom? What kingdom is that?

QUESTION: TRUE KINGDOM, MAN THING. THEE FRIEND AND THEE RUCK IN MINNESOTA, BUT THEE ERR, MAN THING. THEE ERR!

Question: What friend are you talking about?

ANSWER: AYE, DR. 58, MAN THING.

Question: How do we err, as you say?

ANSWER: THEE AND DR. 58 RUCK IN MINNESOTA. YET THERE BE A TRUE KINGDOM, AYE?

Question: Hmmm. What you seem to be saying is that I exist in some sort of lower, perhaps cruder version of Minnesota, a shadow version, but my universe is perhaps a sub universe of some kind of higher, or perhaps more legitimate Minnesota, and this is the true Kingdom. Is that the case?

ANSWER: AYE, MAN THING, TRUE KINGDOM! SAVVY!

Question: Well, Dr. 58 seems to be talking about some version of Minnesota that bears no resemblance to mine. Is the true Minnesota Dr. 58 seeks information about your Kingdom?

ANSWER: AYE, AYE, MAN THING! SAVVY!

Question: How it that you are able to listen in on our conversation? What is your method? And, incidentally, this is rather rude and inconsiderate behavior.

ANSWER; NOT THEE BOON TO KNOW, MAN THING! THIS BE A NEW BOON.

Question: Then forget about it, I don’t want to know how you are listening in, I don’t even want to know why. Offer me this boon, but only if freely and without obligation in the extreme, total and complete sense of the meaning. Tell me your name.

ANSWER: ERR YEE, DO! ERR, MAN THING! NOT BE THIS THY BOON!

Question: Well, then just what the hell do you want? And if you are draining my C-Chits, then you are coming under obligation to me, do you savvy?

ANSWER: C-CHIT FOR THEE SUB MAN, MAN THING! C-CHIT NOT FOR KINGDOM!

Question: Whaaaaat-- evvvvvverrrrr! What do you want!!!!!!!!

ANSWER: TELL YEE THY FRIEND, DR. 58, TO VISIT KINGDOM. DR. 58 SHOULD KINGDOM COME. HE SAVVY YOU.

Question: That’s what this is all about? You want me to use my connection with Dr. 58 to try to convince him to travel to your Kingdom, this region which you say is the “Real Minnesota” Dr. 58 is talking about?

ANSWER: SAVVY THAT! I GEE THEE A BOON!

Question: You want me to sell out Dr. 58, and you will provide me with some kind of reward?

ANSWER: SAVVY! SAVVY, MAN THING!

Question: Ha, ha! Ha, ha, ha, ha! What will you do when he gets there? Perhaps clone him out into some kind of doppelganger, send him back to New York so he can suck out his mom and dad’s brains?

ANSWER: IGNORANT, MAN THING! CRUDE! NOT THEE BOON TO KNOW BUSINESS OF THE KINGDOM. SEND THEE DR. 58 HERE!

Question: I have no power to send him, nor will I recommend that he travel to his version of Minnesota, your Kingdom. If he chooses to go there of his own free will, that’s his business and none of mine. We are finished here.

ANSWER: SEE THEE UP, MAN THING! SEE THEE DOONE!

Question: Once again, and with much, much regret, I must remind you that we are prepared to enact Plan 9 less you cease and desist.

ANSWER: SAVVY ME THIS, PLAN 9, MAN THING. WHAT BE PLAN 9?

Question: You’ll understand it quite well after it rips your face off. Now good-bye.

(That ended the communication with this entity. How curious! I wonder what is really going on?)

Dr. 58 -- Session 9

(Note: The Dr. 58 session continue, here with some preliminaries eliminated)


Question: Dr. 58, before we get bogged down in a million details, can we talk about the satellite disasters you mentioned earlier?

ANSWER:. IT WAS A PROJECT OF THE REICH. IT WAS A DISASTER FOR THEM. FRIGHTENING. IT SHATTERED THE POWER ORDER OF THE WORLD.

Question: Wow! How did it do that, I mean shatter the national world order?

ANSWER: IT LEFT THE NAZI TECHNOLOGICAL DOCTRINE IN QUESTION. IT SHOOK UP THE PSYCHE OF THE WORLD. IT CHANGED THE WAY PEOPLE VIEW THE ORDER OF NATIONS.

Question: What did the Nazi’s try to do?

ANSWER: THERE WAS MUCH EXCITEMENT. THEY SOUGHT TO SET THEIR SATELLITE EYES UPON MINNESOTA FROM SPACE. THEY THOUGHT A NEW ERA WOULD FOLLOW.

Question: Let us back up a bit. Why was this a project of the Reich? Don’t American have satellite technology?

ANSWER: NO, OF COURSE NOT.

Question: That seems astounding to us. Here in our world, America is the premier nation in space exploration and technology. We are the only nation to travel to the moon. We have a gigantic space station, a space shuttle, satellites of all kinds. You say your America has none of this?

ANSWER: NO. WHAT YOU SAY IS AMAZING TO ME. DO THE NAZIS HOLD INFLUENCE IN YOUR AMERICA?

Question: No! As I have told you, we fought a lengthy world war to rid the world of the Nazis. What they stood for is considered heinous by just about everyone, all nation today. But you seem to equate Nazism with technology. Is that the case?

ANSWER: THE NAZI’S MAKE TECHNOLOGY THEIR CENTRAL DOCTRINE.

Question: As you have said. But doesn’t America and other countries embrace technology as well?

ANSWER: NONE AS EXCLUSIVELY AS THE NAZIS.

Question: What would you say is the central doctrine of the American culture in your world?

ANSWER: WE DO NOT HAVE A CENTRAL DOCTRINE. THAT IS OUR STRENGTH. TECHNOLOGY HAS PLACE, BUT NOT SWAY.

Question: Well, what level of technology would you say you have in your society?

ANSWER: IT IS MOSTLY MACRO AND SO ABOVE THE MAJORITY. YOU ASK ABOUT THINGS I TAKE AS NORMAL.

Question: Well, do you have automobiles, computers, electricity, automated factories, telephones, you know, all that stuff?

ANSWER: IT’S DIFFICULT TO KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT. THERE IS ELECTRICITY, BUT THAT’S MORE ON THE MACRO SCALE THAN MICRO SCALE.

Question: The macro scale. Hmmm. You know what, you said that you have money in your society, but you seemed confused -- or amused -- that you or your parents would be concerned with obtaining or using money. I’m going to make a guess: Money, like technology in your world, is used on a macro scale of society and not a micro scale of general society? Am I right?

ANSWER: YOU UNDERSTAND SOME THINGS SO WELL, YET IN OTHERS WAYS, YOU ARE MORE IGNORANT THAN A CHILD. YOU ARE STRANGE.

Question: Ha, ha! You’re starting to sound like my wife. But before we go too far astray again. Let’s get back to this satellite business. Do the Nazis have a very advanced ability to conduct remote sensing from space? That is, can their satellites peer down at the earth with great accuracy?

ANSWER: THAT WAS THE CASE, YES. I DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW THEY WORK.

Question: When I think about it, this must have seemed very exciting. I mean, you said that even the air space over Minnesota is a no-fly zone. So the advent of space-based satellites must have been seen as an opportunity to shed light on one of the oldest mysteries in your world -- just what the hell is going on inside Minnesota, right?

ANSWER: YES, EXACTLY RIGHT. BUT THE ENTIRE WORLD TREMBLED, AS WELL.

Question: Why?

ANSWER: IS THERE ANY WONDER? THEY WERE GOING TO ENCROACH ON THE FORBIDDEN, THE MOST MYSTERIOUS ASPECT OF THE WORLD. THEY WERE PLAYING GOD. STILL, IT CUTS BOTH WAYS IN THE AMERICAS.

Question: What do you mean cuts both ways?

ANSWER: OF COURSE, AMERICANS HAVE NOTHING TO FEAR FROM NAZI TECHNOLOGY, NOR THE WEAK FORCE OF THE MAYAN EMPIRE OR THE CHARCHIMECS FOR … FOR ALL OTHERS FEAR MINNESOTA AT THE HEART OF AMERICA.

Question: Ahhhhhh!!!! Dr. 58, just when we think we’re getting somewhere you throw in a major curve ball! The Weak Force of the Mayan Empire!!!! Mayan Empire! Don’t tell me that you have a Mayan Empire in your world!

ANSWER: YOU DON’T? WHO INHABITS THE LANDS TO THE SOUTH?

Question: A nation called Mexico! Ahhhhhh!!! I can’t stand it! Yes, there was a Mayan Empire there centuries ago, but they were devastated by the Spanish Conquistadors beginning in the 1500s. Only a few ruins of the Mayan Empire remain, and the Mayan people are scattered and marginalized. There culture destroyed. Nothing like this ever happened in your world?

ANSWER: NO. THE MAYANS WENT FROM STRONG FORCE TO WEAK, BUT RETAIN MUCH POWER.

Question: What do you mean by “strong” and “weak”? What exactly are you talking about there?

ANSWER: STRONG MAGIC, WEAK MAGIC.

Question: Oh my. What kind of magic are you talking about?

ANSWER: THEY ARE AN ANCIENT RACE OF ANCIENT POWERS AS VESTED TO THEM FROM THEIR DEMI GOD, QUETZAL.

Question: Wow! You mean Quetzalcoatl, right?

ANSWER: SOMETHING LIKE THAT. I’M NOT AN EXPERT.

Question: Earlier you said your parents infused star water from the Quetzal Cluster. Is there a connection?

ANSWER: THE MAYANS REGARD THE DEMI GOD QUETZAL TO HAVE COME TO EARTH FROM THE QUEZTAL STAR CLUSTER.

Question: Is this considered largely to be myth?

ANSWER: I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

Question: Well, I mean, I’m wondering if there is any proof that Quetzal came to earth from another star system, if this was considered to be a real event. Or let ,me put it this way, since anything seems to be possible here. Have there really been visitors from other planets to earth that you know of?

ANSWER: I THINK IT IS THE CASE THAT THE MAYAN GOD MAN CAME FROM THE STARS.

Question: Well, do they still have Quetzalcoatl’s spacecraft enshrined somewhere? Do they have obvious implements of alien technology or implements?

ANSWER: THAT QUETZAL CAME FROM THE STARS IS MANIFEST.

Question: How so?

ANSWER: IT WOULD EXPLAIN MAYAN MAGIC.

Question: What kind of magic do they have?

ANSWER: OF GREAT SCOPE. THOUGH NOW WEAK AND NO LONGER STRONG.

Question: This is obviously such a huge can of worms, I’m not going to get pulled into it right now. Let’s put the Mayans aside for now and get back to the satellites. Can you summarize what happened in the satellite disaster? What was the main outcome? Wait a minute, wait a minute, you mentioned the Charchimecs. Who are they?

ANSWER: A LESSER NATION OF THE PYRAMID BUILDERS. THEY INHABIT THAT LAND BETWEEN AMERICA AND THE MAYAN NATION.

Question: Like maybe around Texas? Do you have a Texas, a state in America?

ANSWER: THE CHARCHIMEC CENTRAL TEMPLE CITY IS TEXCHO. THE CHARCHIMECS ARE OBSTREPERITES AND INSURRECTIONISTS, BUT KEEP TO THEMSELVES.

Question: They are a violent people?

ANSWER: YES. BUT THEY ARE INWARD FOCUSED. THEY HAVE LITTLE TIME FOR THE MORE SUBTLE AND ELEGANT STARLIGHT CULTURE OF AMERICANS.

Question: Brother! Well, how do they get along with the Mayans?

ANSWER: THE MAYANS ARE SUBTLE BEYOND THEM AS WELL.

Question: (Much drooling over wanting to know more, but determined to move on). Let’s just get back to the satellites. What happened? Just tell us, in a nutshell, what was the result of this Nazi attempt to examine Minnesota from space-based platforms?

ANSWER: CHAOS. TERROR. FEW NAZIS SURVIVED. MANY ON THE FRINGE OF THE PROJECT ESCAPED TO AMERICA AND WENT SOCMAL. SOME SOUGHT REFUGE WITH THE CHARCHIMECS. SOME APPEALED TO MAYAN MAGIC. SOME CRAZY NAZIS WENT TO MINNESOTA.

Question: Ahhhhhhhh!!! What happened? What did the Nazi’s see? What information did they get from their satellite data? What did they see down in Minnesota?

ANSWER: THEY WERE NEVER ALLOWED TO SEE ANYTHING IN MINNESOTA, OR IF THEY DID IT WAS TERRIBLE BEYOND IMAGINING. EVERYONE WAS DEAD. AND MORE THAN DEAD.

Question: Who was dead? (Asking this while restraining ourselves from asking about “More than dead”)!

ANSWER; EVERYONE INVOLVED WITH THE PROJECT. THE FACILITY WHERE THE INFORMATION WAS RECEIVED ON EARTH WAS … A NIGHTMARE.

Question: Where was the ground receiving station of the satellite telemetry?

ANSWER: I DON’T KNOW TELEMETRY. THE NAZI’S HAVE AN ISLAND NEAR THE EQUATOR. THEY CALL IT KRUPP. FROM THERE THEY RECEIVED THEIR INFORMATION FROM SPACE. KRUPP IS NO LONGER INHABITED.

Question: So the Nazi’s had these extensive facilities -- I suppose building and receiving stations and such on the Island of Krupp, and this was the central location where all the space based information obtained by scanning Minnesota was to be received and processed? Were there many people there?

ANSWER: YES. MAYBE 200 OR 300 NAZI TECHNOCRATS.

Question: Well how did it all unfold? When was the first indication that something went wrong?

ANSWER: AFTER INFORMATION BEGAN COMING DOWN TO KRUPP FROM SPACE, STRANGE EVENTS BEGAN TO OCCUR.

Question: Like what?

ANSWER: COMMUNICATION WITH EVERYONE ON KRUPP QUICKLY SILENCED.

Question: I assume the Krupp technocrats were communicating electronically with a home base, perhaps back in Europe, in Germany, or wherever the Nazi’s have their primary location.

ANSWER: YOU USE STRANGE TERMS. EUROPE?

Question: Arrggggg! (Seriously not wanting to get bogged down again). Well, wherever the primary Nazi cities are located. Were the Krupp technocrats in communication with outside facilities?

ANSWER: YES. AND THERE WERE MANY NAZI SHIPS OFF SHORE, IN THE SEA SURROUNDING KRUPP.

Question: Okay, they start getting data from space about Minnesota, communication goes dead. What then?

ANSWER: IT ALMOST SEEMS …. WRONG … TO SPEAK OF IT. FROM THE SHIPS BLACK SMOKE COULD BE SEEN RISING FROM ONE OF THE KRUPP ISLAND BUILDINGS … THEN …

Question: Yes? And then?

ANSWER: AN ABOMINATION CAME FORTH. THREE MEN BECOME ONE MAN. BUT NOW WITH WINGS. AN ABOMINATION MAN. THREE MEN JOINED, ALMOST NAKED WITH LONG WINGS OF LEATHER. DANGLING TENTACLES. IT FLEW TOWARD A NAZI SHIP.

Question: Good lord. What are we talking about here? Let’s try to get this straight. Somehow, through some sorcery or devilry three Nazi human beings were fused into a single body, conjoined as some kind of grotesque flying man creature with wings and tentacles?

ANSWER: YES. THEY STILL HAD SHREDS OF THEIR UNIFORMS ON. THESE WERE THREE NAZI MEN FUSED, TRANSFORMED INTO A MONSTER.

Question: And it flew at the ship? What did it do?

ANSWER: IT CAME AT THE SAILORS ON BOARD. TWO OF THE HEADS WERE WEEPING AND WAILING AND CALLING FOR HELP. ONE WAS CRYING OUT FOR HIS MOTHER. THE HEAD IN THE MIDDLE WAS RAVENOUS FOR HUMAN FLESH.

Question: What did it do? Attack sailors on the deck of one of the ships?

ANSWER: YES, WHILE TWO OF THE MELDED NAZI HEADS WAILED AND CALLED FOR MERCY, THE ABOMINATION BODY SET UPON SAILORS ON DECK SPREADING CHAOS AND PANIC. A SAILOR WAS PLUCKED FROM THE DECK BY TENTACLES. ONE OF THE HEADS BEGAN FEEDING ON THE SAILOR. THE OTHER TWO HEADS CRIED OUT, BEGGING THEIR HEAD MATE COMPANION TO STOP.

Question: Oh good lord! Well, what happened then.

ANSWER: THROUGH SOME EVIL DEVICE, THE MONSTER BEGAN EMITTING THE NAZI ANTHEM.

Question: ?????? What!!!!!!!!! ??????

ANSWER: THE MAN ABOMINATION HOVERED ABOVE A NAZI SHIP, FEASTING ON MAN FLESH. ACROSS ITS BELLY THERE APPEARED A SERIES OF SLITS, LIKE GILLS. FROM THESE GILL SLITS CAME LOUD MUSIC, THE NAZI ANTHEM.

Question: Egad, what a yarn! The thing added psychological fuel to its attack by mocking them with their national anthem? God, for bizarre! Well, then what happened?

ANSWER: THIS WAS THE FIRST OF MANY HORRORS. EVENTS ESCALATED AND DETERIORATED FROM THERE. THE SITUATION BECAME WORSE ON A MUCH GRANDER SCALE FOR THE NAZIS AFTER KRUPP WAS DEVASTATED BY ABOMINATIONS.

Question: Dr. 58, I would guess all of this information would be highly classified beyond being highly classified and so secret that almost no one should know about it. How is it that you know so many intimate details of what happened out there on Krupp Island?

ANSWER: OF COURSE, FROM THE DEFECTORS, THE MANY WHO FLED THE NAZI REGIME AND WENT SOCMAL IN THE UNITED STATES AND ELSEWHERE. THEIR STORY SPREAD LIKE FIRE AROUND THE WORLD.